Well, that is only part of what I am feeling as I pen this down. Honestly, I feel bad but at the same time, I don't feel I am fully responsible. But to a person I care, what more can I say or do?
So here's the story.
I took leave on Friday to get some errant done. It included amongst other, conducting an informal interview, sending my car for servicing and submitting a financing-related application. Anyway, by the time I was done, I am tired and the weather didn't look too promising. All I was looking forward to was to get some rest and relax session in front of my TV, computer or book or simply, on the bed (depending on the mood).
That was when my wife called to inform me my friends asked if we wanted to have dinner together. I explained to my wife I don't feel like going without stating much reason but all I heard from her was "I want to go though." Sigh... it is that guilt trip feeling I am getting. I could have been more firm and insisted on not going but I relented. That was around 3.15-3.20 pm.
Source: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/low/in_pictures/6908612.stm
Anyway, I took the lift to go back to my unit and just as I stepped out from the lift, I heard the sound of heavy torrential rain falling. Shit... heavy rain. I think I don't want to inconvenient my friends so I made a call to my wife to cancel this dinner arrangement. I told her I don't think I want to go as it was raining cats and dogs. Besides, coming all the way to the condo will not be a good idea. She told me it would be ok as my friend's wife will be picking him up at the LRT station nearby. So it wouldn't be a hassle. Sigh... reluctantly I agreed to the original plan.
So, I walked around the unit and as I looked out the window, it is very heavy rain and I am dead tired. I really wanted my rest. Around 4 pm, I sent my wife a SMS to tell her I don't think I want to go and I will be taking a nap. I left it as that.
Around 5.50 to 6 pm, I was rudely awaken by my screaming handphone. My wife was frantically telling me that my friend is coming to the unit. I asked her why is he bothered to come since I sent her a SMS that I am not going? Apparently, she didn't receive it (Is this a common phenomenon?) and she was upset. She said I should have told her earlier or at least inform my friends that I am not going. Somewhat surprised, I told her that it has always been a common arrangement that one person liaise with the other and there is no need for everyone to call on another on these sort of impromptu arrangements. Being all upset, I cut off the line and tried calling my friend. His phone was engaged. So I sent a SMS to let him know I am not going.
Source: http://www.lindatreash.com/old-town-stairs.htm
Anyway, I was sleepy so I just slumped back on my bed. About 5 or so minutes later, my phone rang again. According to my wife, my friend is in the building. And he climbed up more than 10 storeys and rang the bell but no one opened the door. And he went down to call his wife to call my wife or something like that to tell us that no one open the door. I was surprised. I didn't hear a single bell ring. I told her I didn't hear anything and I couldn't reach him on the mobile. She then said it was because he didn't bring his mobile. She told me to wait at the door as he will come by the unit.
I presume he never did or maybe he did but I didn't hear the door bell being rung.
Around 6.20 pm, my wife came home and threw tantrums. She was upset and scolded me for not opening the door for my friend and she ran off to look for him. I was dazed. I tried to call her but I realised she left her handphone in the house. And my friend's wife called her mobile. I answered and she said she is waiting downstairs. I told her my wife is not around and she is looking for her hubby.
Anyway, it turns out later he went off to my in-laws business premise nearby. My wife was angry and scolded me for breaking the arrangement last minute. I told her I sent the message at 4 pm, only 1/2 an hour later from the first call she made about that impromptu dinner arrangement (is that last minute????). She said she didn't receive the message and I should have called them to let them know I am not going (which I find it kind of weird considering all other arrangements were made via a single person from this side to the other side out of ease rather than a formal meeting of sort).
Source: http://blog.dirkschuetze.de/
So I called my friend. He sounded angry. I tried explaining the whole situation, where I sent a message to my wife thing and how she didn't receive it. He then mentioned he is disappointed I didn't bother to open the door when in the past I will open the door. I told him I was in the room sleeping unlike the past where I am at the study room (where the bell is just next to the entrance). Anyway, he said it has passed so he didn't want to talk about it and he will proceed with his wife to have dinner and they are now stuck in the jam. All I say is I am sorry even though to be frank, I am more sorry that he had to walk all the way (contrary to my understanding his wife is picking him up at the LRT station) and climb more than 10 storeys to reach my unit (my condo requires special access cards to use the lift but somehow the management forgot about locking the fire escape stairwells).
Looking at hindsight, there are many things I could have done like giving my wife a call at 4 pm instead of sending a message. But seriously, what is the point of sending a message and then giving a call? More so when she is busy with work and she may not pick up the phone? Anyway, am I suppose to doubt whether every message I send out will be received by the other party?
Based on hindsight again, I could have called my friends but our usual arrangement has always been 1 person from this side will contact the other side and vice versa. I don't see why I should change this arrangement unless I have premonition shit is going to hit the fan.
I feel bad but honestly, why is everyone pointing fingers at me when I pulled out from an impromptu arrangement merely 1/2 an hour when it was set? I also don't want my friends get caught in the jam, climbing 10 storeys of steps and feeling cut off.
Sigh... anyway, I am not sure how to invite my friend out this coming weekend. I know his birthday is around the corner. I am at a loss. Should I just call and pretend like nothing happened or should I just call and apologise again?
That was when my wife called to inform me my friends asked if we wanted to have dinner together. I explained to my wife I don't feel like going without stating much reason but all I heard from her was "I want to go though." Sigh... it is that guilt trip feeling I am getting. I could have been more firm and insisted on not going but I relented. That was around 3.15-3.20 pm.
Source: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/low/in_pictures/6908612.stmAnyway, I took the lift to go back to my unit and just as I stepped out from the lift, I heard the sound of heavy torrential rain falling. Shit... heavy rain. I think I don't want to inconvenient my friends so I made a call to my wife to cancel this dinner arrangement. I told her I don't think I want to go as it was raining cats and dogs. Besides, coming all the way to the condo will not be a good idea. She told me it would be ok as my friend's wife will be picking him up at the LRT station nearby. So it wouldn't be a hassle. Sigh... reluctantly I agreed to the original plan.
So, I walked around the unit and as I looked out the window, it is very heavy rain and I am dead tired. I really wanted my rest. Around 4 pm, I sent my wife a SMS to tell her I don't think I want to go and I will be taking a nap. I left it as that.
Around 5.50 to 6 pm, I was rudely awaken by my screaming handphone. My wife was frantically telling me that my friend is coming to the unit. I asked her why is he bothered to come since I sent her a SMS that I am not going? Apparently, she didn't receive it (Is this a common phenomenon?) and she was upset. She said I should have told her earlier or at least inform my friends that I am not going. Somewhat surprised, I told her that it has always been a common arrangement that one person liaise with the other and there is no need for everyone to call on another on these sort of impromptu arrangements. Being all upset, I cut off the line and tried calling my friend. His phone was engaged. So I sent a SMS to let him know I am not going.
Source: http://www.lindatreash.com/old-town-stairs.htmAnyway, I was sleepy so I just slumped back on my bed. About 5 or so minutes later, my phone rang again. According to my wife, my friend is in the building. And he climbed up more than 10 storeys and rang the bell but no one opened the door. And he went down to call his wife to call my wife or something like that to tell us that no one open the door. I was surprised. I didn't hear a single bell ring. I told her I didn't hear anything and I couldn't reach him on the mobile. She then said it was because he didn't bring his mobile. She told me to wait at the door as he will come by the unit.
I presume he never did or maybe he did but I didn't hear the door bell being rung.
Around 6.20 pm, my wife came home and threw tantrums. She was upset and scolded me for not opening the door for my friend and she ran off to look for him. I was dazed. I tried to call her but I realised she left her handphone in the house. And my friend's wife called her mobile. I answered and she said she is waiting downstairs. I told her my wife is not around and she is looking for her hubby.
Anyway, it turns out later he went off to my in-laws business premise nearby. My wife was angry and scolded me for breaking the arrangement last minute. I told her I sent the message at 4 pm, only 1/2 an hour later from the first call she made about that impromptu dinner arrangement (is that last minute????). She said she didn't receive the message and I should have called them to let them know I am not going (which I find it kind of weird considering all other arrangements were made via a single person from this side to the other side out of ease rather than a formal meeting of sort).
Source: http://blog.dirkschuetze.de/So I called my friend. He sounded angry. I tried explaining the whole situation, where I sent a message to my wife thing and how she didn't receive it. He then mentioned he is disappointed I didn't bother to open the door when in the past I will open the door. I told him I was in the room sleeping unlike the past where I am at the study room (where the bell is just next to the entrance). Anyway, he said it has passed so he didn't want to talk about it and he will proceed with his wife to have dinner and they are now stuck in the jam. All I say is I am sorry even though to be frank, I am more sorry that he had to walk all the way (contrary to my understanding his wife is picking him up at the LRT station) and climb more than 10 storeys to reach my unit (my condo requires special access cards to use the lift but somehow the management forgot about locking the fire escape stairwells).
Looking at hindsight, there are many things I could have done like giving my wife a call at 4 pm instead of sending a message. But seriously, what is the point of sending a message and then giving a call? More so when she is busy with work and she may not pick up the phone? Anyway, am I suppose to doubt whether every message I send out will be received by the other party?
Based on hindsight again, I could have called my friends but our usual arrangement has always been 1 person from this side will contact the other side and vice versa. I don't see why I should change this arrangement unless I have premonition shit is going to hit the fan.
I feel bad but honestly, why is everyone pointing fingers at me when I pulled out from an impromptu arrangement merely 1/2 an hour when it was set? I also don't want my friends get caught in the jam, climbing 10 storeys of steps and feeling cut off.
Sigh... anyway, I am not sure how to invite my friend out this coming weekend. I know his birthday is around the corner. I am at a loss. Should I just call and pretend like nothing happened or should I just call and apologise again?
7 comments:
if that happens between you and me, all it needs is for you to bring some beer and all will be forgotten...
hehe...
nothing much to be sorry about, imho,...but the jam nowadays is bad....real bad...
......................
so good for you to be able to rant as and when you want it in your blog..., i will be starting another blog and stopping the current that I have now... there are so much that i wanted to pour out, but no one to turns too...
cell members would be too close for comfort...sigh...
Wow. Sounds so complicated. Anyway, celebrating a friend's birthday is the best excuse for an apology in an indirect way. :)
dear
chicken feet: but why are you so worried? you shouldn't. you know why i pour all my stuff in the blog? it is for me to be honest to the world. on one hand, the ones who know me knows the real me. the ones who doesn't, have an idea of who i am.
anyway, you can always give me a call (i will get back to you in case i am too busy to pick up the phone at around 11 plus...:P )and we can talk about stuff... trust me, the other best thing about being spiritual brothers, we can be honest with one another.
one thing i learn is when we are in need, we can turn to one another. besides, i rant about our cell leader too in my blog...hahahaha
seaqueen: yeah...it is the asking bit... sigh... so difficult to ask.... how to start...ggrrr....
Just take it in stride, put on a thicker skin and just ask him for dinner that's all. Don't need to be so formal right?
dear seaqueen,
good news... i manage to contact my friend for lunch today. he said he was ok since last Friday so he was a bit puzzled when he read my blog. well, i told him his tone sounded a bit upset so i have to be honest on that. again, i could be a bit sensitive (ya ya...i know...a bit dramatic...:P)
don't worry lar...if there is any progress on the new blog, will inform you accordingly. But a line will be drawn between the cyber kakiayam and the real me...
but will human be able to do that? if i got pissed at you on the net, will i be able to stop myself from being pissed at you in person?
dear kakiayam,
to be honest, i don't think you should launch a new blog. just work on existing.
whatever you publish in public, you know it will be scrutinised. but they are entitled to their opinion as much as your own. just write truthfully and respectfully. if that person is honest with himself/herself, he/she will speak to you face to face and clarify.
and if you potrayed that person wrongly, guess what? you can always publish something afterwords to correct yourself...:)
look, if i am pissed, i am pissed. regardless of using SMS, email, blog, phone message, a letter of just telling it to my face or talking behind my back, i don't think i will distinguish it. but we must be mature enough to be decent and adult when we put our points across.
i think forgiveness is required of us. but if we keep things inside and pretend to be nice outside, there will be one moment in future where you will blow up. no point harbouring bitterness right?
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