Sweeping The Tombs

About a week ago, which seemed so long ago, my family decided to visit the tombs of my grandparents and granduncle as part of the annual Ching Ming (tomb sweeping) festival. To me, I am often fascinated by the dead, no thanks to the supernatural elements attachment I often picture when people talk about graveyards.

By the way, the jam started about 11-12 kilometres away and it was only 6.30am when we got off SILK!

According to my dad, Ching Ming is usually held on either April 4th or 5th and the because of the changing times, people have extended the festival from 1 to 3 days affair to 10 days before and after April 4th or 5th affair. Which is a good thing considering mom had to be operated later the week and she might have missed it if not for this 10-day leeway.

The entrance...
while the lion guards the entrance...

Anyway, this particular festival is linked to the deep rooted Confucius teachings on venerating the ancestors. This is the day where families gather together to clean and sweep the tombs, offer burnt offerings, food and flowers as well as pray for blessings for those who are still living, hoping the ancestors and the dead will bless the living.

Malaysia Boleh!

To me, as a Christian, I stopped praying the dead since I accepted Christ. It is kind of hard, being the only Christian in the family and they don't quite understand why can't I give respect by merely holding the joss stick even if I don't believe in it. Well, despite all the explanations on why we are told not to worship the dead, to them, it is still disrespectful but they have since accepted my shortcomings. Meanwhile, I only silently step aside, do what I can do i.e. locate the tombs, carry the offerings from the car, cut overgrown weeds and clean the tombs (quite irrelevant for my grandparents tombs since they are maintained by NV Multi Corporation Berhad).

It has been awhile since I last saw the sun rise...

As I survey the area, it has changed over the years, there are more dead resulted in more visitors and NY Multi Corporation being listed in Bursa Malaysia. Nonetheless, this memorial park remains peaceful and quiet, perhaps a good place to indeed have final rest.

The stone maiden looks onward to the other tombs...

My mom always said it is not good for the living to occupy the land meant for the dead. I guess why she said that is because the living should not deprive rest for the dead. Oh well, I as a counter argument while we are still living and uncertain when we will exactly die, what's wrong with hedging against inflation?


Yup, it is basically increasing at 8.4% per annum since 1990. Not bad considering banks only offer 3.7% for 12-month fixed deposits placement.

On that note, I told my sister I prefer cremation and scattering the ashes into the sea. Less hassle, one-off event (since I only live once and after that to judgement) and cheaper as well...:P

A Quarter Pass 6

Source: http://www.cornerstoneworshipctr.org/doctrine.htm

It was a short operation. Seriously, we thought it will take 4-5 hours. Instead, it was only 1 hour and mom was awake shortly after. In fact, because we expected it will be a long wait, we decided to go out and have coffee as there are no place for us to seat outside the operation theatre and by the time we got back, the operation is already over. Praise be to the Lord indeed!

She vomited a few times and according to the nurse, this is normal reaction to the general anesthetics. Not sure if that is true but we can only accept it as it is until we get clarification from the doctor tomorrow.

Will she require chemotherapy and/or radiotherapy? We will only know in the coming days. For now, we thank God the operation is successful and she is out of danger.

Thank you to all for your prayers and well wishes. My family are truly grateful...:)

Even In Sickness, Mom Cares

I didn't manage to key in any entry yesterday as I was hit with an agonising fever. I suspect it is the curry puffs I took but then again, I didn't vomit or had diarrhea. As I struggle for the rest of the afternoon at work, I couldn't focus on work. I sensed the then impending illness as my body slowly showed signs of its intrusion. Firstly, the discomfort in the tummy, then the finger tips turned cold followed by the headache. I quickly took 1 panadol from our office First Aid kit and it helped somewhat.

I was worried. The first thing that went across my mind was about the meeting with client tomorrow. Also, can I drive home? Surprisingly, despite the body aches and shivering, I managed to.

Mom asked if I have seen the doctor? I said not yet, perhaps later. I never got to do it for the rest of the night as I laid on my bed in agony and cold.

Anyway, I quickly went to my room. I decided to sweat it out. I knew that once I start to sweat, the illness will subside. But somehow, despite sleeping under thick layers of blankets, I could not get a single sweat out. I can't move much, it is rather painful actually to shift sleeping position no thanks to the cold and body aches.

Source: http://www.irandokht.com/forum_subs/forumarticles.php?forumID=6&sectionID=11

Mom walked in and she was worried with what she saw. She touched my forehead and held my hands while she said, "You must see the doctor now, your forehead is burning and your hands are so cold". Mom did what every mother will do. She worries for her child in sickness. She gave me a hot drink soaked in ginger. She rubbed my back. She asked me to drink more water. She asked my wife to help me to put on additional clothings.

She is worried alright and you can see it written all over her face. Looking at me like that, she couldn't do much. She knew it is my own battle. Later, when I started sweating and the fever slowly subsided, mom is relieved. Mom then said,"I think you need rest. Don't work tomorrow and stay at home. I think the hospital is not suitable for you so stay at home and rest."

And you know what? The irony is, mom will have to battle her own tomorrow. Yet she doesn't mind going through alone. Yes, my dad will be there and so is my sister. Even in her own sickness, she still thought about my welfare. And instead of mom, the first thought that went across my mind is about the meeting with my client tomorrow when I realised I am falling sick. I must be a disappointing child if she can read my thoughts.

Anyhow, I replied by saying I will still go. I told her the fever is subsiding and she doesn't have to worry about me. At that moment, it is comforting, when in agony and pain, you see your loved ones around you trying to do whatever they can to provide relief, support and care. Despite the fact that they can't do much, whatever they can, it is enough to tell me I am not in it alone and whether that illness will be a life or death issue, or I am going to miss my meetings, it is not important anymore.

So, to my mom, I will be there too because she deserves to know she is not alone facing this battle. Even if all they can do is to stand there, waiting, worrying and praying for the next few hours about the outcome of the surgery.